It’s easy to feel overwhelmed with the pressure to constantly post on social media. When it feels like your future depends on keeping up with marketing trends, and you’re not trained in marketing, it adds to all the other stresses of self employment. For wedding suppliers already busy with admin, emails and accounts, it’s hard enough to find time to be creative. The expectation to jump on social trends and share behind the scenes reels is relentless. So we need to recognise that there’s another, quieter way. The solution is to step aside from social media marketing trends and understand that we can have visible wedding businesses without pretending we’re someone else.

This article, in a nutshell

• Wedding suppliers don’t need to perform for reels, if it’s not in their comfort zone. There’s a softer way to build trust with couples.
• Your personality doesn’t need to be huge. Quiet, thoughtful, empathy is just as relatable.
• Being authentic works away from social platforms – finding an online space to be published is effective.
• Managing work life balance and taking care of your mental health is important. A calmer approach to marketing your business helps.

The role of dancing or stand-up comedy in wedding business growth

Some wedding suppliers are born to entertain…

I enjoy the funny and outspoken stars of wedding supplier instagram. Photographer and mentor Andrew Keher’s reels are just brilliant. Lovely Lakes wedding photographer Tiree Dawson’s pure and authentic fits of giggles are wonderful.

The awesome (and arguably coolest) UK wedding photographer Mark Horton said in a reel, “people shouldn’t doubt how cool they are, or if they’re enough for suppliers”. And that message really matters. Not all wedding suppliers are the cool kids, but we all have a spark that makes us amazing in our own ways.

… but it’s ok if your content isn’t designed to go viral

Algorithms feed on insecurities – suppliers are wondering if they’re ‘enough’ for couples too. It’s why we all need a break sometimes. We’re constantly scrolling and comparing our work, our photos, and our approach to marketing with what our peers are doing on instagram. (I’m reluctant to use the word ‘competitors’ because that’s not how the wedding industry feels to me – it feels built on mutual support rather than competition.)

For new wedding suppliers, I can imagine social media makes it really daunting by serving you amazing content from other, more established businesses in your niche.

But trust me – established wedding suppliers are struggling with the same pressures. I’ve worried sometimes that I’m ‘too old to be doing weddings’.

The truth is, I’ve honed my calligraphy skills over two decades and kept up with trends – my work is beautiful and I’d love to own that although I doubt myself daily. But on my socials, it would be a scary thing to say. (I feel safe saying it here.)

I’ve felt like I have to show up on instagram. I’ve believed I’d be forgotten if I took a break – by couples, by my wedding supplier friends, by the platform and algorithm itself. I’ve worried I’m too quiet, too old-fashioned, missing trends I should be jumping on within hours of their appearance.

I know I’m not alone. As amazing as the performers of instagram are, we don’t all have the creative energy to make reels strong enough to go viral. And that’s ok. There’s another way.

Being authentic is what works – in many different ways

The secret isn’t making hilarious reels. It’s being yourself. Yes, the funny and brilliant wedding suppliers are phenomenal at social media. But they’re being real – that’s their personality and it comes naturally – to them.

For the rest of us, comedy reels wouldn’t land the same because our discomfort would come across somehow. A lot of advice on how to make reels / get followers / grow on instagram isn’t specific for the wedding industry: it doesn’t help us make meaningful connections with nearlywed couples.

To make genuine connections, use your authentic voice

It’s a big wedding industry narrative: personality-filled celebrations are the best. If you get married and guests say “it felt so you” – you’ve nailed it. It’s easy to miss the fact that personalities don’t have to be big or extrovert. This applies to couples, to their weddings, and to suppliers. Quiet, calm personalities are equally wonderful.

Couples are looking for a supplier with your personality

There’s a world of couples out there. Some are camera shy. Some are neurodiverse. Some crave quiet moments, some long for a crowded, busy dance floor. Some adore nature and birdsong. Others are metalheads, Comic-con obsessives, bookworms, artists, hikers and cat people. The same goes for suppliers – we’re all different.

Our values are what shape our wedding businesses. Sharing online doesn’t have to be 100% product or service-focused.

A bespoke tailor might talk about being inspired by their coastal town and love of place.

A caterer’s perspective on ethical food production and sustainability is valuable.

A videographer’s background in sport is a connection point for couples.

A cake designer’s quiet independence and shyness will resonate with the right couples.

Whoever you are, whatever your values, these bring strength and truth to your wedding brand. Treasure what makes you unique, and you won’t need to follow social trends to keep up with hundreds of couples. Focus on finding the ones who will connect with you on an authentic level.

Keep being authentically you: never change

Away from constant algorithm updates and social trends, there’s space online for you to be yourself. Throwing all of your thoughts and opinions into blog posts in a rush isn’t needed. You can relax, gather and organise what you want to say, then take a calm approach to growing your visibility online.

Those values you hold close – your love of wild spaces, sustainable ethics, LGBTQ allyship – are who you are. There’s no urgency to talk about them today as if you’ll be another person next week. Being consistent matters more.

Including your values in articles and blogs over time will build trust with couples and other wedding suppliers. They might not read every post you write, but if they do, they’ll come to recognise your personality, warm to your words, and trust your brand by relating to it.

Being visible without blowing your own trumpet

Selling can be uncomfortable, can’t it. No matter how talented you are, it’s hard to talk about your skills to people who don’t know you yet. There are other ways to gently share your credibility and experience, so don’t worry if self-promotion feels awkward for you.

Calm, modest and confident visibility

It’s kind of nice to let couples discover your talents without having to yell about all the things you can do. We’re lucky to work in such a visual industry – often photographs will say everything about a wedding business’s style, aesthetics, and approach.

Social media doesn’t allow time for anyone to stop and really look at a photograph. You’re lucky if people will read your captions: instagram moves too quickly.

The alternative is to place your brand on a platform where your couples and contemporaries will discover you more deeply. Context changes everything.

Appearing naturally on a wedding website – as a key supplier for a featured wedding, or having an article you’ve written published – is how to be seen without self-promotion.

Another layer of context to support your reputation

Everyone is on instagram, from the £££££ wedding planners to inexperienced startups undercharging for their services. Couples have no way of filtering out the kind of brands they don’t relate to.

Wedding websites and blogs are curated. The editors and blog owners care about their guest bloggers, and are meticulous about quality contributions. Being published in the right places really counts.

Choosing to publish where it feels right for your brand

Wedding blogs and platforms are looking for ethical, dedicated, and lovely wedding suppliers like you. The relationship you’ll have with a blog should be balanced and fair. So the first contact is in your hands entirely. Choose a blog which resonates with you as a safe and valuable place to be published.

When your published wedding content just … flops

We’ve all been there – a real wedding or styled photoshoot gets accepted onto a major blog (yay!) and is published (woohoo!) perhaps even with an instagram share (OMG!) and then… tumbleweed. It happens. And there’s a reason why it happens. (It’s not you.)

No one pours their heart and soul into a styled shoot* for “exposure” these days. Any blogger or publisher who doesn’t see the hours you spend designing, editing, planning and promoting a shoot isn’t worth working with. Luckily most do.

*The same applies for beautifully written feature articles: thought pieces and any other content you take time and care to produce.

A worldwide wedding blog or social media account with hundreds of thousands of followers has to give you more than just a hefty viewing figure.

Getting published in the wrong place, reaching the wrong couples (geographically, or by budget, or wedding style) won’t bring any long term benefit for your business – only theirs.

Being published on your chosen platform instead

A wedding blog whose audience is closer to you is worthwhile being featured on. Especially so if their values align with your own, and if they’re a trusted supporter of wedding suppliers.

A little note on submissions – as a wedding blogger, most submissions come to me from photographers and stylists. But if you’re a wedding stationer, make up artist, celebrant, musician or videographer, you can still submit a shoot or images from it to a blog – I’d love to hear more from the creatives whose businesses tend to end up at the bottom of those credit lists. (Because hi – that’s my business type too!)

A healthy way to grow your wedding business

If Instagram, TikTok and Pinterest suddenly weren’t there, I imagine we’d feel two things. Panic first – at the loss of our followers, our grids, and our supplier communities. But also, a sense of relief and freedom. No more imposter syndrome, no more comparison with other suppliers.

Posting and publishing at a pace to suit your wellbeing

It’s possible to take control and allow yourself to step away from social platforms. If your work life balance is wobbly, and you feel you need head space, it’s ok to focus on slow visibility instead.

The beauty of blogging and being published on wedding websites is that your articles will work together over time. A series of real weddings, helpful articles, inspiring photoshoots and appearances on respected platforms becomes a solid foundation for long term discovery.

This feels sustainable for any self employed wedding business owner

It’s so hard for wedding photographers in the autumn when all of the editing is due all at once. Admin overwhelm hits almost all wedding businesses hard at the beginning of the year. (HMRC – we’re scowling at you for this!) In a seasonal industry, there are extra challenges we all face.

Taking away the pressure of constant social posting, and replacing it with a slower, thoughtful approach to visibility, helps manage overwhelm – vital in our industry, with its delightful peaks and tumbleweedy times. Not forgetting (I almost did) that we have lives, and families, and a right to holidays too!

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You don’t need to be a showperson to have a wedding business.

Success doesn’t make a beeline for those of us who shout loudest. Your personality – whether you’re quiet, kind, or just have a sparkle in your eye – will be the heart of your brand. Sharing your values in a way that feels authentic to you, appears honest to others, and fits your work life balance, makes your business discoverable for longer.