AI is becoming a major wedding planning tool with thousands of couples generating checklists, speeches and even vows this way. There’s a lot of curiosity about the rights and wrongs of AI in weddings, and concern over the future of weddings styled by AI. So is it OK to use AI for your wedding? No one has all the answers, but I’ve rounded up some of the really interesting stuff people are saying about using AI in wedding planning.

In this article:

• AI for ceremonies and writing vows
• Writing wedding speeches with AI
• Using AI for wedding budgets and checklists
• User error, inclusivity and what AI’s missing
• So should we be worried about AI in wedding planning?

AI for wedding ceremonies: the surprising truth from independent celebrants

Meaningful ceremonies are becoming a major focus in modern weddings. The meteoric rise of independent celebrants are joyfully driving this change, as couples turn their attention from Pinterest-fuelled aesthetics to heartfelt, personal ceremonies. You might think this is the crucial aspect of your weddings AI shouldn’t touch, but even according to celebrants, it’s really acceptable to use AI to help write your wedding vows. You just have to approach things the right way. What Celebrants Think of AI Wedding Vows

AI for wedding vows and speeches: how to pitch it just right

In the summer I wrote on English Wedding that using AI to write personal, heartfelt aspects of a wedding ceremony worried me.

“I understand it: it’s daunting to have to stand in front of a crowd of people and speak from the bottom of your heart. But that’s the key: if you speak from the bottom of your favourite search tool instead, it won’t have the same ring.”

Then I discovered websites and apps offering to write your entire wedding speech with AI. You fill out a little form, and the website automatically generates your personalized and impactful wedding speech. But the secret to speaking well at a wedding isn’t just about the words: it’s all in the delivery. Even AI wedding speech websites tell you to practice and deliver your speech with confidence, because it’s that human connection that will win over hearts and minds as you begin to talk on the day.

Wedding checklists and budgeting with AI

I was sent this report with words from a real bride with dyslexia who had found AI really helpful in writing her wedding vows. Add To Event’s survey of 120 newlyweds found that one third (32%) used AI to help plan their wedding, from designing invitations to writing wedding speeches. According to this survey, wedding checklist creation is the top use of AI, while budget tracking is the third most popular – highlighting how couples are turning to tech to keep their wedding plans organised.

Let’s not underestimate how hard it is to plan a wedding – and using a tool to help isn’t wrong: we just need to be careful.

The Knot recommends using AI for vendor emails, note taking during vendor meetings and building your wedding website. But when it comes to wedding design, it’s pretty clear: styling suggestions from AI won’t take into account your budget or any constraints set by your specific wedding venue.

Here’s the danger with AI and wedding styling: the robots are feeding themselves. Instagram wedding giants are creating images of opulent, aspirational setups with insane florals and incredible styling. Of course they look amazing: they’re not real. Neither are they affordable.

But this kind of fake wedding content gets a LOT of likes. And so, AI loves the engagement, decides that it’s what we all want to see, and uses the same OTT styling advice when we ask it for ideas for our own venues.

Fine if money’s no object and you can fly in a florist who’s happy to work from AI ideas. But AI’s styling ability hasn’t evolved enough to really consider your venue, your available suppliers’ own styles, the importance of a cohesive theme across multiple suppliers you’re working with and so on: so its ideas are really unlikely to work in real life. There’s an interesting article on Vogue from a bride who used ChatGPT to plan a wedding – you can read it here.

The Wedding Edition asks what gets lost when the personal touch is handed over to code.  And there are so many questions still to be answered. For some couples, asking AI about budgeting is super helpful. But I wonder, does AI’s reliance on “average wedding budgets” give a realistic view of all the choices available to couples?

I’ve always – in the fifteen years I’ve been editor of English Wedding – been mistrustful of average wedding budgets. I’ve never seen one which isn’t skewed by asking a non-representative panel. (By which I mean, “average budgets” from Vogue’s readers aren’t going to match what Bridebook’s audience would say. And neither of these include the cost of a UK African or Indian wedding.)

So when you ask ChatGPT what the  cost of wedding flowers is, what does it include? Where’s it getting that data from? Does it have a hell of a lot more to learn before you can trust it?

And after all, do you really want to be average? Why not mix things up? Choose what’s important to you and spend on that; save your money on other aspects of your wedding or skip certain details entirely!

User error, inclusivity and what’s missing from wedding planning with AI

AI’s responses to wedding planning questions are based on how it interprets your questions. Let’s stick with budgets and checklists: you’ll get a different result if you ask these questions:

1. What’s the average cost of wedding flowers?
2. What’s the average cost of wedding flowers in Stirling, UK, based on a wedding for 65 people using seasonal flowers in April?

Most importantly, how do you know the answers ChatGPT gives you are accurate?
The moral of this little story? Be specific. If you’re a regular AI user, ChatGPT will (creepily) know where you’re from, and can recommend local suppliers in line with your budget… IF they rank in AI search.

But as a supplier I know this stuff is hard. Do bear in mind that AI wedding recommendations might not include amazing creatives in your area who aren’t web-savvy or optimising their websites for AI.

AI’s wedding planning responses are NOT inclusive: it always assumes there’s a bride!

On a side note, when I was asking ChatGPT about the cost of flowers for a wedding in Stirling, it suggested bride’s bouquet, a couple of bridesmaids and some buttonholes plus table arrangements. When I clarified my request for two African grooms (and no bride) it quickly refined its result, starting with “Love that.” It’s trying to be cute but even to me, it feels patronising…

Should we be worried about AI’s influence on modern weddings?

AI is changing our everyday. Of course it will change how we plan our weddings, just as it impacts our daily lives from writing emails to looking for information. But we’re not robots, and anyone who has fallen in love knows how important human connection, authenticity and personality are. Perhaps we should all be a little more aware of how magical it is to be free thinking, a little bit weird at times, and trust in our selves to plan weddings from the heart.

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In a recent survey of newlyweds, one-third (32%) used AI to help plan their wedding, from designing invitations to writing wedding speeches.

Conducted by Add to Event, the UK’s leading event marketplace, the survey reveals the most popular ways couples are using AI when planning their wedding.