Bespoke poetry can be a wonderful way to tell your story but how do you find a really good poet? A guest article by bespoke wedding poet Kathryn Anna Marshall

What do you want to remember from your wedding day? Cake? Flowers? Chair swags? I didn’t think so. All of these elements have a part to play in your big day but more and more couples are looking for a wedding day that just feels more “them”. A lot of this is about the fact that many wedding traditions belong to our grandparents’ generation, a time when a wedding was between a man and a woman, who lived in separate homes before the big day and a time when a wedding was more about doing what was required than celebrating love.

Fast forward to 2025 and we’re in a world that embraces the wonder and beauty of love, in all its forms. Rather than being a way to fulfil a litany of expectation, a wedding is a way to celebrate your individual love story. Bespoke weddings are built from what’s important to you as a couple. This can mean things like choosing to have your ceremony delivered by a celebrant, exploring creative documentary style photography or even forging your own ethical wedding rings. The only limit is your imagination. And the legal bit.

Amongst all this we have what is arguably the most important element – the words that are part of your ceremony.

Alongside the vows you make to each other, many couples still like to have wedding readings. The question is what to choose.

If you search online there are dozens of ideas, but very few of these can be regarded as personal. This is where a bespoke poem can really sparkle. The challenge is how do you find the right poet for you?

How to find the best writer for your bespoke wedding poem

As part of my research into what people might want from poetry for their wedding readings, I took a look at what was already available. I’ve got to be honest; I was surprised and not in a good way. Whilst there are a handful of people writing really beautiful work, far more seem to offer “cookie cutter” poems – pieces with just a name change to a standard template, or a list of events in the couples’ life with a rhyme at the end of each line. This made me sad – people were paying a lot of money for a personal poem that really wasn’t personal. How can you be sure your bespoke wedding poem will be everything you need it to be?

Here are a few simple things to look out for when researching who to commission to write for you.

First step is to take a look at the poet’s existing work. It’s useful to the poems aloud – do you like how they sound, or do they sound a bit like a nursery rhyme? Are the poems all very similar? Do you feel like there is a sense that the poet has tried to get to know the people they are writing about? Or have they just made a list of basic facts?

 

The second thing to look out for is the pricing structure. Poets that charge by the line always raise concern for me simply because work that is restricted by the number of lines can be formulaic and often lacking in authenticity. As a poet I rarely write a set number of lines (unless the form demands it – haiku, or ghazal for example) preferring to let the story I’m telling dictate the way the poem develops.

I also worry if a poet charges for redrafts. I know from experience that any poem needs several drafts to truly become its best and when I’m writing for someone else, I want them to feel able to ask me to alter the work if it’s not quite what they had in mind. Charging for redrafts restrict this and seems very unfair.

The final element to consider is the writer’s credibility as a poet. Do they have any work published? Do they seem to have a real passion for using language to tell a story?

A poet who is actively writing for their own pleasure and possibly publication is likely to have taken time to study poetic devices and have a wealth of techniques to use that will make your wedding poem go from blah to brilliant.

One of my best examples of this is writing for a fantastic couple whose story involved meeting while working at McDonalds and rescuing Syrian hamsters.

Here’s the feedback I received:

“Kathryn was able to take those moments and turn them into a poem detailing our relationship up to the wedding. Kathryn made meeting at McDonalds and rescuing hamsters into an elegant and romantic story. The poem is perfect, very ‘us’ and the way she described these moments between us definitely brought a tear to my eye!”

Now, I’ll be honest this was a challenge – simply writing the events and making them rhyme would be easy. Making an elegant and romantic story took skill, care, and close consultation to make sure I’d got the tone exactly right. As a poet I want to use my skills to create the very best poem I can, one that I’m proud of and that the couple who have commissioned me are delighted with.

“I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.” – Maya Angelou

Ultimately finding your ideal poet comes down to how you feel when you read their work.

If the poems you read raise a smile, a tear, a sense of what makes this couple unique, then there’s a strong chance you’ve found the best poet to tell your story. If the sample poems leave you feeling a bit flat, or just indifferent, then it’s time to move on and find a poet who will give your story the sparkle it deserves.

Taking time to research and having a bit of knowledge about what to look for will help you get the very best poem for your wedding reading, and something that you will treasure as testament to your love.

---

Kathryn Anna Marshall is a poet, writer and columnist based in Shropshire. She is the author of two books, Yes to Tigers and Dust, and has poetry published in numerous journals and anthologies. Her bespoke poetry has been part of wedding ceremonies across the world, and her poetry prints adorn many walls as a happy memento of the day. Kathryn prides herself on offering insight, care, and expertise to every commission, and is always thrilled that the words she writes can bring a couples’ love story to life.

Find out more: https://www.bespokepoemsbykathrynanna.com