So Covid threw us all the biggest curveball, and we’re left wondering how we get married now. Planning a wedding suddenly became something of an uncertainty: thousands of 2020 couples have postponed weddings until 2021, and no one knows for sure when social distancing won’t be a thing any more.
Rather than telling you how you ‘should’ plan your 2021 wedding – because who even knows? I think flexibility and an open mind are the safest steps forwards right now – I wanted to share some of the best things about the rather fabulous celebrations we’re now calling micro weddings.
The thing is, folks have been having tiny weddings for years. There are so many reasons to have a micro wedding – and they’re not all bad! Here’s a few…
- Covid (ok so that’s the bad one)
- spending sensibly
- freedom to do things your way
- keeping things low key
- busy lifestyles
- adorable venues
- being married at home
Perhaps you’re thinking about a smaller wedding because “30 guests” has had so much press coverage recently. Perhaps you’re not sure if a micro wedding is right for you: or perhaps you love the idea! Maybe you’ve had to adapt quickly to the idea of a micro wedding because of Covid. I’d love to help reassure you if you’re worried: plenty of couples choose to have an intimate wedding, and love every second. Here’s why!
1. Guest list planning is super quick!
A micro wedding is one with a teeny number of guests – it’s bigger than an elopement (2 guests) but apparently smaller than an intimate wedding – basically we’re talking 2 – 20 guests here. So couples planning a micro wedding get to pick the people they love most of all in the world, the family who are there for them and the best of best friends in their lives. And compared to choosing a hundred of the people you know, that’s a quick and relatively simple task to tick off in your wedding planner!
2. Many pennies are saved
I’ve never really believed the stats put out by the wedding press about the “average cost of a wedding” being however many thousands. (They always seem super high – surely they don’t quite reflect everyone who’s getting married. Still.) What I do know is that wedding costs are generally ‘per head’ and that price for catering and venue hire is the biggest. I’ve seen the smiles on couples’ faces at micro weddings – they’re madly in love and beaming with happiness, but I’d bet they’re at least 10% more happy because they haven’t spent quite so many thousands of pounds as Big Wedding People.
3. Expectations fly out the window!
When people know you’re having a micro wedding, they’ll realise it’s something different. And from that point onwards, all the other ‘different’ things you do will be more readily accepted by the traditionalists amongst your nearest and dearest. No cake? Walking down the aisle together? Seeing each other the night before? Suddenly these will all be part of your ‘unique wedding’ – and less likely to be questioned by your small circle of guests. The new traditions you create will add to the excitement!
4. Your boss won’t expect a wedding invite
Let’s face it – there are some guests you invite because you feel like you have to. The loud uncle, your mate’s bitchy girlfriend, the uni friend you hardly know any more – and those people you’re forced to spend your working days with, being amicable when you’re not feeling it! If you’re having a big wedding for 100 guests at a big venue, colleagues will all expect to be going. When they find out you’re only having a micro wedding they won’t expect to be invited. Win!
5. You get to keep your life as normal before the big day
I’ve seen couples spend every weekend in the months before the wedding making plans, making signage, practicing wedding cake making and organising guest travel plans and accommodation. The more guests, the bigger the space and the more mouths you have to feed, the more complicated it all gets. So if you’re only having a handful of people at your wedding, the pressure’s off and you can enjoy life almost as normal in the run up to your big day.
6. Quirky, quaint, personal spaces make great micro wedding venues
We all have our favourite places to go – little boutique hotels, woodland spaces or quirky city centre hideouts. (Oh! Do check Jordanna’s list of top 10 quirky London wedding venues!) Smaller, more intimate and cosy spaces are easier to book for a large group than hiring a stately home or exclusive use wedding venue which both tend to come with all the expectations from 3) above! You might even choose to…
7. …Celebrate at home!
There’s nothing like kicking off your wedding shoes and really relaxing – and having a micro wedding at home, or at your parents’ home, means total freedom to relax on your wedding day. Any sleepy children at your wedding can head up to bed when they’re tired, but you can still stay up dancing or chatting to your guests until the wee small hours. No curfew, no restrictions, just pure relaxed wedding day bliss!
8. Traditions can be skipped – we promise, that’s a huge win
Every wedding tradition you ever heard of is optional – and with a non-traditional (ie smaller) wedding comes the bonus of ditching the traditions you don’t fancy. Let’s begin with tossing the bouquet, shall we?! You can also avoid garters and horseshoes, white dresses and veils, best men and bridesmaids, oh and massive stag and hen weekends if they don’t float your boat!
The absolute top benefit of having a micro wedding is its easy, laid back vibe. With only a handful of guests attending, all the pressures are off. You get to be yourselves. You get to save thousands of pounds – which means you can spend on what really matters to you. And if Covid does happen to be the reason you’re considering an intimate wedding, you get flexibility. Think of the logistics of postponing a small celebration in your favourite country gastropub vs postponing a church ceremony followed by a massive marquee do with all the trimmings.
I can totally see why couples have been choosing micro weddings for years – those savvy couples have been on to something this whole time! The shiny happy faces in Jordanna’s photos here are all I need to see, to convince me there’s something really, wonderfully special about having a smaller wedding.