Hello my lovelies,
I do hope that you are still looking forward to having your big day in whatever shape or format it takes. I want you to know that life is full of ups and downs. But despite what it brings, it cannot and should not cancel out the dreams that you have for your future.
Love is certainly not Cancelled
Shopping for your wedding dress is like no other shopping experience. Frankly and honestly, it is overwhelming! It is a whole new world full of jargon and fabrics that most women have never had to deal with before. Not to mention the bright lighting, lack of consistency in sizing, and the added pressure to look beautiful. So too is the experience itself. It is different for every bride-2-be. Whilst some brides want to turn it into a weekend affair to be shared with their besties sipping champagne in up-market boutiques, others prefer to keep it private and low key visiting a few shops at a time to find the service that is right for them.
In this article, I am going to share a few key tips with you to help you manage your expectations so that the event is more about you than on trying to attain an ideal that will just leave you drained and frustrated. I hope that drawing on my experiences of working with hundreds of brides throughout my career, will help to lessen the pressure on yourself. If there is anything else that you wish to ask me, or perhaps you would like a personal one-2-one to discuss your needs, you can find my details below.
1. Finding a beautiful wedding dress which fits your amazing body
Have you put off dress shopping as you haven’t lost weight yet? Are you worried and anxious you will not find a dress you love or that fits you? And, instead of embracing who you are and learning to work with what you have, you start with damning your size and shape? Well stop! If you want a dress which looks amazing and feels amazing too, then you must start with buying one which fits you.
The truth is, no dress will fit you exactly. Unless it is a bespoke dress, you won’t have the privilege of a perfectly fitted dress, so don’t blame your body if your dress feels tight or unsupported in the right places. These are all aspects that every bride who purchases a shop bought dress will have to deal with and a service that most boutiques will provide. Even if you plan on losing more weight closer to the big day, consider leaving those big alterations until nearer the day. For now, the most important thing to focus on is finding your style. Everything else will come together in the end.
2. Learn to be happy for who you are
Self-acceptance and self-love are important ingredients for body confidence. Your body has been there for you every single minute of every single day, since the day you were born! She has carried on despite your judgemental comments and has stayed with you despite your criticisms.
If you talked to someone like you talk to yourself sometimes, you would not stand for it, right? So why do we find it acceptable to talk so badly of ourselves and to ourselves? Cut yourself some slack and start treating yourself like your own best friend, it does wonders for your confidence knowing you have your own in-built cheerleader supporting you all the time.
3. Remember your fiancé? He loves you unconditionally
Yes, every lump, bump and wobbly bit. When we can see ourselves through the eyes of people who really care about us and love us, we start to see a difference perspective. And I’m pretty sure that when he sees you in that stunning dress which fits your body perfectly (see tip #1), he will love you even more and feel like the luckiest man on the planet (which he is, by the way).
4. Stop weighing yourself
The scales will only tell you the numerical value of your gravitational pull. They will not tell you how beautiful, amazing and wonderful you are. Your weight is not a reflection of your self-worth nor will it ever show you how much you are loved by your friends, family and future husband. Body confidence comes from the inside, it is who you are and not something you have. Enjoy your wedding day, you are awesome just how you are!
5. Find ways to start improving your self-care regime
So whether that be a bath, a new moisturiser or going for a walk, do more of that good stuff -especially when you are stuck into wedding preparations. Believing that you are worthy of your own time dramatically improves your body confidence as we take care of the things we love, don’t we?
Drinking more water daily is not just a great way to flush the toxins from your body, but also aids with water retention. Avoiding heavy carbohydrate laden foods will minimise water retention and keep your body operating at its best.
6. Save your pennies
Use the money you are planning on spending on a diet, detox, cellulite treatment and splash out on a pamper day, spa day or something extra delightful and luxurious for your wedding. A pair of new shoes as a treat cheers me up instantly and boosts my confidence too. Besides, a girl can never have too many shoes!!!
7. Stand tall and breathe
It might sound strange, but we don’t hold our heads high and this can have a big impact on not only our posture but also on how we feel about ourselves. Practise improving your sitting and walking posture over the next few months. Like walking with a straight back, chin up and chest out. And don’t forget to breathe. Breathing in deeply helps to relax you and is such a great thing to practise doing daily to help calm the wedding day nerves.
I am Cynthia Grafton-Holt, bespoke wedding dress designer and master of all things red carpet and I love designing and creating exclusive experiences for my clients. Ones that help them to turn their negatives into positive glowing outcomes. From finding a style that elevates and helps them to shine like a diamond, to personally crafting a pattern and a gown to help them to overcome their body confidence issues.