Who To Bring (and Not) on Your Hen Party

If you’ve started planning your hen party then you’re probably thinking first about who to invite. This is a very important part of your hen party, and it has the ability to make or break your hen party. Who you bring on your hen party can make it cool and fun – or it can make it lame and totally pathetic. Now we know we’ve got your full attention! Here’s our advice, on who to bring and who to leave off the invite list to your hen party:

Must Bring: The Best Friend. We probably don’t have to tell you to invite your best friend – but we thought we’d start with the fun stuff first. Inviting your best friend – and inviting her first is so important. Your best friend knows you so well that inviting her nearly guarantees you’ll have a great time. She knows what kind of discos you like, your favorite cocktail, your favorite fun activities and how to keep all of your deepest, darkest secrets!

Maybe Bring: His Sister. We’d have to put this as a “maybe” because we don’t quite know what type of sister your future hubby has. If the two of you get along like gangbusters then we say go ahead and invite her. But if she’s a serious stick in the mud, then its better not to. If you don’t invite her to your hen party, follow our advice and try to plan some sort of fun girls’ activity for just the two of you. If she knows about your hen party and realizes she’s not invited, her feelings could be hurt. Smooth things over with an invite to get pedicures at your favourite spa.

Not Bring: Your Boss. Even if you get along super well with your boss, we’d have to put the nix on inviting your boss to your hen party. It would be that rare boss and subordinate relationship, maybe a family business where you’d invite your boss to your hen party. But don’t worry too much, your boss may expect an invitation to the wedding but they probably don’t expect an invitation to the hen party, so you’re in the clear here.

Must Bring: College Roommate. Inviting your college roommate is ideal for your hen party. Even if you haven’t seen your college roommate in awhile, now is the perfect time to get together. Perhaps you went to her hen party and now she can come to yours! Bringing your college roommate will remind you of the fun times you had in college, and you’re certain to have another fun time at your hen party again.

Maybe Bring: Coworker “Buddy”. We’d have to say this is a Maybe invite because it can depend on the relationship with the coworker buddy and also the type of office you work in. The biggest challenge is if you work in a very social, friendly office and you only invite one coworker buddy to your hen party. There can be a lot of hurt feelings in the office the next day! Sometimes it is easier not to invite your coworker buddy to your hen party – because if you do you’d feel you would need to invite five others too. The other challenge with inviting your coworker buddy is that then someone in the office knows exactly what happened at your hen party, and you may want to keep that type of info private if you know what we mean. And we think you do!

Not Bring: Anyone That Gives You the “Ick” Feeling. This isn’t an exact person but we know you’ll  recognise them instantly by that “ick” feeling you get in your stomach when you think about them. It may be that cousin your mum thinks you should invite. It could be a friend you just aren’t as close to anymore. It could be your future hubby’s sister (we hope not!). But whoever it is, don’t invite them to your hen party!

Author: Rebecca, Chillisauce. Events Management Company. Specialising in Hen Parties and Stag Weekends



  • Belinda McCarthy
    9 years ago

    Not having had a hen party myself (I ducked out of that particular one!), but seen plenty, one of the most tricky ‘invite or not to invite’ must also include your mum! My mum, for example, wouldn’t have wanted to go even if I invited her, but I know plenty of people whose mums have expected to have been invited along – that falls firmly into the ‘icky’ category for most people, I guess!

    • Claire
      9 years ago

      That’s a great point Belinda. I’ve been on hen nights where Mum came along for the meal and had a taxi booked for 10pm to whisk her off to safety… while the younger hens let their hair down a little more.
      It’s a nice idea to let Mum bring a friend too: Auntie, etc. 🙂

  • Betty Hale
    9 years ago

    Hen party etiquette (or indeed party etiquette in general) is always a tricky one and where to draw the line as to who to invite or not. They type of hen party you’re planning may be another factor to consider when doing the who is in/who is not debate.
    For example a wild night out on the town may be better kept to the younger brigade perhaps followed by a more sedate gathering for the more “mature” female friends and relations.
    I recently helped with a friend’s hen night planning and it must have been almost as stressful as planning the wedding trying to keep everyone happy.

  • Ruth
    9 years ago

    I had a staggered hen to avoid the above – we started at 5pm, with a meal at a popular all you can eat buffet for absolutely everyone (groom’s sister, mum, cousins, aunts…big and close family!), cocktails at 7pm (with my whole office) and then went clubbing at 9pm. Everyone paid their own way and just turned up to what they were comfortable with – and by 12am it was only my best buds still going so we ended the night doing karaoke, just five of us 🙂 No-one’s feelings were hurt and it worked really well.

    • Claire
      9 years ago

      There you go Ruth, I hadn’t seen your comment when I wrote mine about letting Mum escape at 10pm! You have the perfect solution there with everybody coming along for the parts they wanted to. Thanks for sharing your tip!
      Claire xxx

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